Some place between sleep and pain
She is awakened by the sound of rain
gently embracing her sleepy state
for once it’s okay to be awake
closing her eyes she lets the rain in
she imagines it falling on her skin
at first it trickles then it pours
the warm fresh rain she adores
then a cool breeze takes place
blows slowly upon her wet face
she smiles, it feel so great.
Someplace between sleep and pain
She is awaken by the sound of rain
magnificent imagery. The word awaken is the wrong tense. Awakened is past tense. Again your imagery is very sensual and vivid. The mechanics of language is your your only weak link
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